Spiritual Practice for Loss and Grief (continued)

Crying is the greatest of all spiritual practices for releasing grief and healing from loss. Still, even those of us who sniffle at sentimental commercials may have problems opening to the devastation of tears that feel like they will go on forever. Unfortunately, those are the very tears we need to shed. It's easy to get caught in a pattern of resisting them until they break through in an overwhelming, painful bout of crying, after which we are left even more resistant to opening to the grief. Choosing to spend a few minutes a day doing practices to support grieving can make a big difference. Instead of draining contraction and ongoing pain and depression, there can be a sense of release, of refreshment and luminous peace after your tears.

I'm very good at derailing my grieving by shifting unconsciously to a mental process of observing, trying to understand what the tears are about, what triggered them, etc. This thinking tends to quickly shut down the emotional flow. While this may have been a desirable way of maintaining control when the grief was so huge I couldn't have contained it, in the long run, it's been counterproductive.  I discovered that my busy brain, trying so hard to keep the pain at bay, could be invited into unity with my emotions if I held the thought "I feel sad." My crying would begin to flow without obstruction or resistance.  You can easily create your own "mantra" to help yourself open more fully into the release of sorrow, or anger, or whatever emotions are presenting as part of your healing work.  Next...

Copyright © 2001 Jennie Knoop. All rights reserved.
Revised: January 09, 2002